Real Love

  Do you believe in love at first sight? And I am talking love not lust. I have had this conversation with numerous people and I have maintained my position… absolutely not! Now granted, I am not here to tell you whether you should or should not believe in it, it’s just my opinion. In general, I think that ‘love at first sight’ is garbage. So, let me tell you why.

For starters, for lack of better terms, I “bloom” late. Meaning, I cannot and have not ever fallen in love within a month of time. I need to have known, been around, and dated you for months before I can even form those types of thoughts. Here, time is of the essence. I need that time to build feelings, to build trust, and to build a relationship. With ‘love at first sight’, there’s literally no time to get to know a person. You could be locking eyes with a serial killer, but guess what? You didn’t take that time to get to know his homicidal tendencies.

Next, let’s look at “the look.” When you are giving someone “the eye”, it does not automatically mean, “I love you and I want to be with you for the rest of my life.” Please. That look means,’ I’m interested. Come over here and talk to me.” The only time when that look means more is in the movies or on television. How many times have you seen a character’s eyes bug out as huge red hearts with their mouths gaped open? So for the people who actually believe in this, is that how ya’ll really look? I’m just curious.

And lastly, there are times when your mind separates from your actions and your heart. For example, your mind says no, your heart is indecisive, and your body allows you to go home with a stranger since you’re feeling frisky. So in this case, how can you tell wholeheartedly that you are truly feeling love and not lust when you see the man or woman of your dreams (or so you think)? What if you begin dating the person you supposedly fell in love with and find out that they are married, they are really ugly inside, they are abusive (abusers are charmers), and so on. Then what? Would you stay because you fell in love? “He or she was so perfect, what happened?” Or would you doubt that your original feelings were really love?

I would like to take the time to invite all of the readers who truly believe in love at first sight to share why they believe in it. C’mon…don’t be shy;)

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4 thoughts on “Real Love

  1. You must first know what love is to give love.. Too many think this is the same feeling of euphoria that happens when sparks fly.. but this is not true unless you understand the igniting of this place. This is no time to show your side that has no other… This means stop hiding what you want what you need and what is within you at all times.. If no lies happen in the beginning then no lies will happen without.. So many forget the meaning of the truth will set you free. How close do you feel you could go if this was the case. Unconditional is the same meaning as no judgements no recourse and no take backs.. Let this be your mantra and something deeper could find it’s way to you. No one is without baggage no one is without a sad story or painful story.. Just remember none of those things make up the love inside they just contain it.. Allow something genuine to be and something genuine will find you! I know you read this and say if that were only true and real.. We make up our own reality are you sure you don’t want to miss out because someone said it was impossible. Who makes you up? Who created you? Is that who has the power to say it isn’t real and you are chasing a false reality? Conditions not being met are not what you are looking for.. look for the unconditional moment that makes you whole!

    • You went deep on here, Clarkkent07! I like that! I agree…love cannot be confused with the feeling of euphoria, or lust, or excitement over the newness of a relationship, or even passion.

      Baggage within itself could be a blessing (it could prevent you from making the same mistake twice) or damaging (or it could lead you down a naive path where you continuously make mistakes), and to some extent, baggage is what allows you find something genuine. For example, say you recently broke up with your boyfriend or girlfriend and someone new tries to enter your life. Your baggage (this devastating breakup) has you put your guard up and allow some healing time before you jump into something new. And to go further with this, if this new person is true and genuine, then something would blossom with time.

  2. Baggage is the residue of a past moment that either carries a negative tone with it.. Because we are able we hold onto such things.. It is easier to hold onto pain that it is to let it go..cause who are we without it? This has caused such uncertainty with how we connect here.. We first don’t pay attention to the true vibrations we can feel from another to know if they are in sync with our own.. Next we lose site of the ability to look inside ourselves to understand how to heal what matters most! We have little use for going to the core of ourselves in order to truly let the voice of the soul be heard as it will be when we leave or before we come here.. Yes I refer to birth/death.. It is not that we fail to.. we continue to teach what is learned which teaches past emotions, past mental barriers, past conduct of the human condition that prevents such a place where we can let go in every moment.. That if we all were mindless we would connect to the right frequency within being. It will have to get to this stage before we truly find the answers of what this experience is.. Again I applaud your post. And thanks for responding back!

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