Everything’s perfect. You meet the man or woman of your dreams. Your relationship is headed in the right direction. And you can’t imagine experiencing true happiness in life without your significant other. There’s just one catch…their child.
How do you deal with a child of your mate’s that you don’t like? Do you play pretend? Do you voice your opinion to your boyfriend/girlfriend? Do you sit the child down and talk to them?
Two things should definitely happen if this situation were to occur. One thing for sure is that you better make sure that things are squared away before your relationship becomes permanent. Don’t bring unnecessary drama into a marriage. Marriage is tough enough. Secondly, be respectful. It doesn’t matter if the child is a newborn or fifty. The child is an extension of your mate, so attempting to hurt their offspring, verbally or physically, is a big no-no on so many levels.
Is blending families easy? Not really, but of course it’s easier when everybody likes each other. But, not every blended family is that lucky. I read a book by one of my favorite authors (Kimberla Roby) last week in regards to this type of situation. There was a married couple and the husband had an affair a couple years before and produced a child. The couple ended up taking the child in because the little girl’s mother was very ill and eventually passed. The wife was so beside herself that she wished harm on the innocent three-year-old and went as far as to ignoring her every time the child talked to her because she absolutely hated her husband’s offspring.
Now granted, this is a different type of situation, but all in all, what is the right way to deal with a child who is biologically not yours and you can’t get along with? Any thoughts?