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Into Thin Air

???????????????????????????????????????   Some may agree and some may not, and that’s okay. But there are some celebrities out there who just need to go away…for a long time. And when I say “go away,” I don’t mean die. I would never wish death on even my worst enemy. But there are some people who are just flat out annoying (even their presence) and the media hypes them up over the silliest things. For example, there was an article on my number one person who tripped. Seriously?? The public needs a picture and a write up on this?

Anyways, without further ado, here is my top twelve list of celebrities who need to vanish A.S.A.P.

1. Kim Kardashian- Just sick of her!

2. Taylor Swift- She is an immature brat. How many times is she going to publicize her breakups in a song? On top of that, Kanye gave her a severe boost in popularity after he stole her shine years ago. She just needs to go.

3. Drake- I can’t stand his being.

4. Nicki Minaj- I think she annoys herself too.

5. Kanye West- He’s just  an ass. Do I need to get any deeper?

6. Rihanna- She takes off her clothes in an attempt to disguise the fact that she can’t sing. So sad.

7. Justin Bieber- I just don’t like him. He seems bratty and catty.

8. Lindsay Lohan- She serves no purpose.

9. Jennifer Aniston- How long are people going to feel sorry for her and Brad Pitt’s breakup? It was a Hollywood marriage that was doomed long before Angelina entered the picture. Just read any interview they did while they were married.

10. Lil Wayne- Wack.

11. The Whole Kardashian Family- If they burp, they’re in the news. Who cares about any of them, really?

12. Tom Cruise- He’s just weird.

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The Game

h   It’s Saturday night. You’ve got on your tightest pants or shortest dress. Your high heels, dangling earrings, and Mac lip gloss. You and your girlfriends ride together, and within thirty, you arrive at your destination. The club. And as a woman, what do you expect when you first step in? Wack lines. Whomp whomp.

Now granted, I haven’t been out clubbing with my girls in a while. Matter of fact, I have even fallen asleep in a couple because it’s not my thing anymore. But I can guarantee one thing without even having to step back into one- there’s going to be a lot of drunk men with no game.  So fellas, if you do anything on this list… STOP IT IMMEDIATELY!

1. “Hey ma.” For starters, I am not your ma, boo, boo thang, sweet thang, girl, or any other variation. Secondly, you are men. Please have some manners before stepping up on somebody. And lastly, if you don’t know my name and you substitute it with “ma,” it wasn’t meant to be.

2. “Lemme holla at chu.” No.

3. “Why you look so mean?” This line should not be a one size fits all type of deal. You hear this all the time. If you want to say something, bring some substance to the conversation. But think about it for a minute. If you were walking through a crowded, funky room and getting bumped constantly and your feet stepped on or even have a drink spilled on them, you would be frowning too. Or if you’re on a mission, for example, headed to the bar or the bathroom, sometimes you aren’t aware of your facial expressions. So fellas, I’m gonna tell you a little secret. This line is tired and annoying. So stop it!

4. “You can’t have friends?” Are you kidding me? Say the shoe was on the other foot. Say I hook up with my new club friend and we end up in a relationship. Would you be okay with me getting new club “friends?” Hell no! You’re selfish.

5. The nonverbal grab. Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about. I’m not going to say anything, but instead I’ll just grab your arm, butt, breast, or whatever. I had one guy that was bold enough to jump on my back after I ignored him grabbing my arm and the back of my shirt. This is just totally unacceptable on all levels. Why are you touching me? What do you want? Get your hands off me. All pop into my head when I see or experience this. This is definitely not a turn on. Don’t touch me. Moving on.

6. The stare. This is just creepy. I know you guys are just trying to see if you can catch a woman’s eye, but damn. Didn’t your mama teach you that staring is rude? Staring in any situation is weird and uncomfortable, but add the dark and an active atmosphere to the mix. I’m gonna just think that you’re plain ole crazy or a stalker.

Do you have any weak lines that you can add?

It’s Time

  I am long overdue for this… here comes a three-parter. This is a topic that we can all relate to at one time or another- break ups. We’re going to start this series off with knowing when to break off a relationship. Yes, break ups are hard to do (sometimes) and a lot of times, you have to really hit that point of no return before you can totally call it quits. But there are certain situations that make breaking up simple. Below are the top eight reasons why a couple should break up (not in any particular order). Feel free to add some of your own in the comments section.

1. Disrespect: This could come in all kind of forms ranging from putting your dirty feet on a table (with or without shoes on), to cussing you out, to cheating, to humiliating you in front of people, to staying out all night or coming in whenever.

2. Abuse: This is for either you (male or female) and/or your children. You need to get out, especially when children are involved because their safety comes first. You cannot imagine what children go through when they witness abuse or are abused themselves. So if there are any victims of domestic violence with children who are reading this, if you don’t do it for yourself, please do it for your children and get out!

3. Not in love/ No purpose: I’ve been in plenty of useless relationships. I know it sounds trifling, but there was a point in my life where I needed something to do. Did those relationships last? No. Some longer than others, but was I mentally or emotionally attached? Not a chance. You get to a point where you have to grow up and treat yourself better than that. If your relationship is not leading to something, then what is the purpose (unless you and your mate do not want to get married)?

4. You don’t like who you’re with: Now granted, there may be times where you don’t like each other, but if you don’t like your mate on ANY day of the week…there’s a problem.

5. More cons than pros: When you start feeling that itch to move on from a relationship, make a pros and cons list. If that list is twenty to one, favoring the cons…there’s a problem. And if those cons aren’t fixable, keep it pushing.

6. Lack of trust: When you lose trust, there’s no love. End of story.

7. Lack of appreciation: Everyone likes to feel appreciated and what’s wrong with letting that person know? The problem is sometimes we neglect to say or better yet show our appreciation to one another then we start taking them for granted or pushing them away. It’s the pushing away that makes it easier to leave.

8. Take advantage: Everybody has a part in a relationship, but if one person is doing their share and part of yours, why should they stay? I’m a firm believer in an equal partnership and if you can’t get with that, you’ve gotta go.

The White Lie

  “Do I look good in this?” “Am I good enough?” “What’s on your mind?” Is there ever a good time in a person’s relationship to feed your mate a little white lie? Do you believe that sometimes it’s better to lie than to tell the truth or is truth truly the best policy?

Acceptable

What could possibly be acceptable to lie to your partner about? Maybe you don’t have the to heart to tell them that their gut is hanging over their jeans. Or you hate their favorite shirt. Their feet are jacked up.  You hate their mother.  I get it. Sometimes you choose to spare your mate’s feelings. Or you tell them about some things, but choose to not tell them about others for fear of bringing out a laundry list of complaints. Fine, but make sure that it’s small and very insignificant.

Not Acceptable

There are numerous things that should not be lied about and that should be discussed. For instance, if you knowingly passed someone a STD and denied it when confronted, you’re wrong. Or you lie and say that you’re happy with your partner and you’re totally miserable. “That’s your baby,” Chris Rock stated in a comedy show that that’s women’s biggest lie. Well ladies, don’t blame a child on whomever you want the daddy to be. But if that’s true, then one of men’s biggest lies are, “He ain’t mine!” Be honest with yourself and others. When it comes down to serious matters, don’t try to lie your way out of the situation. There’s obviously a reason why you’re there. Talk it out. Not everything can get swept under the rug.

What were some little white lies that you’ve told?

I Know You Want Me

  Why is it that when you are single, nobody will give you a second look? But let you land in a committed relationship, all of a sudden, everybody and their mama wants to get with you! It’s like people can sniff out when a person is unavailable. Suddenly, you’re more attractive, been working out, or applied more make up. And then what is their response when you explain that you’re taken? “So.” “What does that have to do with me?” And my favorite, “You can’t have friends?” I swear if I hear that last one one more time, that person’s getting slapped for sure!

I think that it’s quite ironic how people could hit on you and want you to themselves when you’re in a relationship, but then if you were to drop your mate for them, then they wouldn’t trust you. So my question is, what’s in it for you? The chase? The thrill? To see how far you can go?

Another twist. What I also find interesting is how you hear more and more about married people stepping out on their spouse for another married person. My hair dresser and I were discussing this topic last week. I’m tired of hearing how someone’s wife broke up with her boyfriend and now wants to go and work it out with her husband. Huh?? Your playthang didn’t work out so now you want to crawl back home? No thanks. Married people guess what? It’s not always the single friend that you’ve gotta keep your eye on. Just as likely, or maybe even more, you’ve gotta watch the ones who are married with or without a ring on.

Like I said, I don’t know what it is about a taken man or woman. Maybe it’s the pheromones, the chase, or the game. If you’re in a relationship, someone’s going to throw it at you, but how are you going to respond?

OMG LOL

  Texting has to be one of the greatest technology inventions ever. It’s convenient. Immediate. If you can’t talk on the phone at that moment, shoot a text. Got one word to say, text it. You get the picture. It’s to the point where I can have a whole conversation and be totally content or almost prefer it. But sometimes, there are some conversations that should not be lessened to text. And if you were bold enough to do these first six things, then shame on you!

Top six things NOT to put in a text (not in any particular order):

1. Break up- You should never break up with someone through text. That’s just flat out wrong. ‘Nuff said.

2. STD- Do I really need to explain this? Okay, I’ll just say this. Putting another person’s life in jeopardy and then having the audacity to sum some heartbreaking news like this in a text is scandalous. Put on your big boy draws/ big girl panties and actually talk to that person.

3. Affair- Umm… you are literally letting the air out of a person’s tire when this is done. This is never okay and this is the type of act that would leave a person scarred for life. Not only are you admitting to cheating, which is devastating enough, but you cowardly place that confession in a text. Your partner deserves more than that. Even if it’s to get back at them, it’s not a good look. Period.

4. Pregnancy (especially unplanned)- The words “I’m pregnant” said to a guy (unless the baby was planned) is already earth shattering, but now you want to text that?? I can’t even think of a good enough reason to do this. Just don’t.

5. Death/ serious illness- I could see if the person is not close to you. Okay, whatever. But NOBODY should get a text that says, “Oh yeah, did you know that your sister died?” “We’re burying your brother tomorrow.” “Dad’s dead.” Are you serious?? Once that initial shock of the passing wears off, cuss that person out til there’s no tomorrow!

6. Marriage Proposal- That would get an automatic NO in all caps. And then, “Are you serious” would follow up.

 

Top three things that ARE acceptable (if they were stated verbally first; not in any particular order):

1. “Stay away from me.” Sometimes people need things said verbally and in writing to really get the message. This is one of those things. All caps is very effective too.

2. “Don’t call me anymore.” Self explanatory.

3. “I love you.” I included this because this should be said when there are mutual feelings involved. It becomes awkward when someone professes their love and you feel nothing. Then there’s a problem.

If you have difficulties wondering whether or not to put something in a text, then you probably should not. Think of it like this. Would you want to hear these type of things through text if the shoe was on the other foot. Ladies and gentlemen, you have to consider other people’s feelings some times.

Why Is It So Difficult?

   Why is it so hard for people to make friends after college? Is it because we like our close knit childhood friends better than meeting new people? We get comfortable and can’t even picture someone taking their place. Are we too afraid to let people in? Some people get territorial. They believe that they can only have one best friend or maybe just a few and that’s enough. Years ago, I read something that stated that on average, people have three close friends. Now granted, I don’t know if they specifically meant three same sex friends or not, but think about it. When you hear the word ‘friend’ do you have at least three people who automatically pop into your mind? I think that that writer may have been onto something.

Can we not make new friends because we don’t get out much? You seriously have to be involved in something to meet a new friend. Whether it be school, work, church, gym, etc. Not only are you two involved in the same activity, but you also have to strike up quite a few conversations in order to maintain contact and develop something. You can’t just meet someone that day and say, ‘Yeah, let’s exchange numbers so we can hang out this weekend.” Um…no. I don’t know you and I’m not handing out my number to strangers.

So, what are you missing when you close your mind off to meeting new potential friends? You miss living your life. Sometimes friends are only there for a season or a certain part of your life. For example, sometimes you lose touch after you move away from them. You need to have that option of going out with someone, talking to them for hours about your issues, or crying on their shoulder. For guys, you need someone to watch the game with or hook you up with their girlfriend’s friend.

You also miss out on sharing a part of yourself and vice versa. Maybe you never thought someone could ever understand what you’re going through, until you meet your new friend who either embarks on the same journey or has someone close who has. Sometimes it feels so good to unleash your deepest feelings and secrets to someone without them judging you. Now granted, I wouldn’t suggest this at the beginning of a new friendship, but only when they have become a good friend. All in all, I think that we should all try to open our minds and our hearts to the possibility of a great friendship developing. Even though you may have three true best friends, there’s still room for plain ole friends.