Always a Sign

  The older you get or once your friends get married, it often leaves single friends wanting a monogamous relationship even more. You may go out more. Ask a friend to hook you up. You may even dress up a little nicer. Normal, right? Yes. However, there are some things that are the total opposite of this. The correct term for this wack behavior is called: thirsty. Let me explain what I’m talking about by using examples.

* Your girlfriend calls to catch up after not talking for a while. You tell her what you’ve been up to- work is stressful, money is being stretched a little too thin, spouse is good, etc. Now it’s your girlfriend’s time to catch up and all she can talk about is her chasing after some man who doesn’t want her. There may be ONE line about work, but it’s usually, “Work is work” or “Work is good,” but then the next forty-five minutes is dedicated to a man who’s “just not that into you.” So thirsty– you just wanna hang on to whatever so you have something to talk about.

* A man continues to call a woman everyday who does not answer or call him back. Eventually, he becomes satisfied with listening to her voice on her voicemail. So thirsty. Next thing you know, he’ll go out and buy a blow up doll and tape your picture on the head.

* You think that every man or woman that passes by and smiles at you is interested. So thirsty.

* You want to get noticed by anyone. You may stick out your chest in a crowded room (if you’re a woman), speak loudly so the focus is on you at all times, etc. So thirsty.

* You call a family member or a friend to get in touch with someone you’re interested in…but they don’t respond to your advances, time and time again. So thirsty.

Whomp, whomp. Stop throwing yourself at people. It makes you look crazy and extra desperate. So unattractive.